ah yes.

I had a little epiphany watching Drop Dead Diva. (Bimbotic much, Rachel?)

An old lady (who turned out to be a husband-killing psycho in the end, but that’s not the point) told Kim to “get over herself” and basically stop judging people based on her own experiences and her own way of thinking. Basically Kim and Grayson were representing this old lady who didn’t want her house bought over by a developer (think en bloc) because she was attached to the memories of her husband there. Kim couldn’t believe that anyone could be so attached to a house as she had never formed such an attachment to any house herself (being the child of divorced parents and being shipped from home to home) and did something sneaky, which kinda backfired and led to the old lady giving her the aforementioned scolding.

When Kim’s face fell, I knew exactly how she felt. I think we’re all so cocooned in our own world that we think our experiences are the be all and end all, when they’re not. Most of the time, we think too much of ourselves, and judge people too quickly based on our past experiences when that particular person’s story might be completely different even though it looks the same on the surface.

Like Kim, I think I need to get over myself, stop using my own experiences to look at people, and understand them from their own perspective, which is shaped by their own experiences. I suppose it boils down to the maxim “Do unto others what others want to be done unto them” and not “Do unto others what you want done to yourself”. The latter is actually pretty selfish, if you stop and think about it.

So the moral of the story is? Be less judgmental. I try and I try not to be judgmental but somehow always slip up somewhere. :( I suppose all I can do is keep trying.



Filed under musings

4 responses to “ah yes.

  1. Jo

    the struggle of humans, but i guess we will get better with practice :)

  2. Caits

    You’re one of the least judgmental ppl I know already. So dont be so hard on yourself!!!

  3. Weijia

    Thanks for this post, it really made me think and came at a time when i really need this. Thank you.

    and yeah. mind over matter, mind over action. just like how we form bad habits through repetition, so can we form good habits through practice.

    let’s strive on together and make this world a better place, starting with ourselves :)

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